I’ve scoured the internet for ways to keep my home cleaner. I keep coming back to the analogy that cleaning a home with kids is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos. But after much trial and error, I think I’ve come up with a surefire plan to help us moms keep our homes spotless.
How to Keep Your Home Spotless with Kids
#1 – Always clean up one toy before moving on to another. If the kids can’t manage this, they probably don’t need toys.
#2 – Limit your toy collection to 1-2 per child. Less is more, right? Oh, and try to avoid toys with a lot of pieces. (I’m looking at you, blocks.)
#3 – Don’t cook or bake. And if you do, never let your kids help.
#4 – Don’t hold the baby. Or the 3-year-old. No matter how much they protest. It only makes it harder to get stuff done.
#5 – Try to keep your kids out of the dirt and sand. Enough said.
#6 – Avoid arts and crafts at all costs. Don’t let them use crayons, markers, or paint. (I shouldn’t even need to talk about glitter.)
#7 – Only feed them food that isn’t messy. Like white bread. In fact, you may want to consider only feeding them food that the dog also enjoys eating. It’ll make clean-up much easier!
#8 – Skip sleep. Instead of going to bed, do some deep cleaning. You’ll feel invigorated by the sparkling baseboards and dust-free blinds, and will wonder why you even needed sleep in the first place.
#9 – Don’t play with your kids. You ain’t got time for that!
#10 – Hire a cleaning lady — with all that extra income the kids are generating for you!
#11 – Never let them do things for themselves. Like squeeze out their own toothpaste. Or feed themselves (unless you’re closely following rule #7 above).
#12 – Keep the TV on. All the time. No screen-time under 2? Psshh.
Ok, I’ll pull the tongue from my cheek now. Of course I joke, but I often find myself balancing the “rules” above with reality. I’ve found that the Konmari method of tidying has been helpful, and have also come up with some guidelines for tidying with kids. But, at the end of the day, I find that balance is the name of the game.
So now I want to know… what “rules” would you add to this list? 😉